In today’s society, a lot of things are structured around couples. It’s often just assumed that as adults, you should have a partner at a certain age and that there’s something rather odd if you don’t. At other times, you might feel like you are made to feel like spare parts in the family, social groups, and even in churches. But the Bible doesn’t say so. Yes, marriage is good, but so is singleness. Paul speaking in 1 Corinthians 7 about the state of singleness being a gift. I encourage you to read that chapter. We should embrace our seasons in life, whether it is singleness or marriage, as a gift of God’s grace to us.
I know for many Christian singles, singleness isn’t a gift but a season of trial because of the pressures surrounding it but it is important you recognise your season of singleness as a gift from God and make the most of it for as long as you have it, do your best to live a godly life, in your thoughts and your deeds. Be self-disciplined and accountable. Focus on God and invest in yourself. And to the married folks, don’t think of singleness as the second best and make your single loved ones feel uncomfortable because you’re married. Instead, encourage them, pray for them, help them avoid ungodly choices, and remind them that God will never leave or forsake them and that we’ve all been equipped to face temptations.
Now let’s address a few points on singleness:
1. SINGLENESS IS HARD BUT NOT PERMANENT
As we know many single people are repeatedly asked the dreaded question, “Are you married?” “When will you get married?” which creates tthis overwhelming feeling and sometimes, it leads to some thinking their life is somehow on hold or they need to get married at any cost. In addition, many singles struggle extremely with loneliness, lust, fornication and the likes but it is important to be self-disciplined and live a godly life, both in thoughts and in deeds during seasons like this. Paul speaking in Philippians 4:12-13, “I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do all this through him who gives me strength.”
2. YOUR DESIRE FOR MARRIAGE IS NOT A BAD THING
Your desire for marriage is in no way a bad thing- God gave it to you. Marriage is a good thing. In fact, Proverbs 18:22 says “ He who finds a wife finds a good thing and obtains favour from the Lord. The “He” referring to the groom not God. This shows that God uses means to bring about His purpose and we should not overlook our responsibility to act. Yes, God has great plans for you but you need to put in the work. We all know that we don’t get our degrees by only waiting on the Lord. You have to prepare and then God will crown your efforts, same applies here. Step out in faith!
3. IT IS A SEASON TO SERVE AND GROW
It is a time to serve God and bloom where you are planted. Invest your time and energy into the work of the Lord and in your personal development (career, skills, goals, education, relationships, etc.). Use the gifts and abilities God has given you, both natural and spiritual. The gift of singleness (the state of being single) is an opportunity. Paul makes a point on this in 1 Corinthians 7:33-35 that he sees great opportunity in singleness, especially the opportunity for undivided devotion to the Lord. So, continue to grow in your walk with God, empower yourself and in His perfect timing, He will perfect all that concerns you.
GOD’S PROMISES FOR YOU IN YOUR SINGLENESS
If you are having a hard time being single and wondering if God will ever bring you a spouse, remember these 5 Promise Scriptures: Jeremiah 29:11, Hebrews 13:5, Philippians 4:19, 2 Peter 3:8-9, Matthew 6:33
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